I can't stop thinking about 1 year ago... what I was doing, and how I was feeling about to take the plunge.
I had the most wonderful and easy time planning our wedding.
I had a super team of wedding experts working with me and my momma doing everything and anything I wanted to make our day the fairytale I had always dreamed of.
This was something VERY important to my mom. She has always said from day one that she will give her three girls their dream weddings at any cost. I think this was so important to her because she never got her dream wedding and wanted it so bad for her daughters. I can't wait to do the same one day for my daughter.
I really am so spoiled and lucky. Do you ever just feel so overwhelmed with gratitude that you just cry and cry and cry? Well I do.
While planning, everything fell perfectly into place... almost too perfect - like surreal.
Our whole engagement from July 11th '09 - June 19th '10 I was SO happy/calm/confident/totally ready to get married.
My parents on the other hand had their doubts about Kade, and I couldn't blame them with his past and our history together and all - But I always knew it was right.
Despite their feelings, they decided to put all of that crap behind us and welcomed him into our family with open arms, which we were so happy about.
The whole time while planning I was waiting to get freaked out - you know, for something to happen to send me over the edge and get all crazy with doubt. I was waiting for it to really hit me that I was getting married.
I am a nervy stress case.
Its no secret.
I worry and worry and worry and worry.
Does it do any good? No. Do I still do it? Yes.
I hate this about myself and I really am trying to change this behavior and learn to relax more.
SO everyone was just waiting for me to go ballistic and freak out... I was too.
We waited and waited... and waited.
While I was packing my makeup and stuff to go over to the Villa to get all dolled up, I honestly brought stuff with me that would help me clam down when I freaked out. Not if I freaked out... When. I knew it was going to happen.
Well it didn't.
The day of I was the picture perfect vision of a calm and happy bride... to every one's surprise.
I had this wonderful feeling of confidence in my gut that told me I was making the right decision and that everything was going to be okay.
I have never been so sure about anything in my entire life.
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